Category Archives: Monday

Box Office

Monday Morning Shower Report: Box Office 7/15-7/17 or A Disappointing start for Ghostbusters

Morning Bleary-Eyed fans, hope everyone had an excellent weekend…well, at least better than Sony did with the new Ghostbusters film.  Only have time for a quick recap of last weekend’s Box Office results, but I really have to apologize for the lack of posts recently and of course I want to spend just a moment to mourn all the lives lost in the past few weeks.  I love films more than a lot of things, but escapism right now feels, I don’t know, wrong.  Especially when so many are suffering. Now I don’t want to speak for anyone other than myself (Manchicken has his own opinions), and it’ll be quick.  So just as simple as it can be: Black Lives Matter, White Lives Matter, All Minority Lives Matter, and NO ONE deserves to die at the hand of another other, absolute extreme circumstances notwithstanding.

Not near enough of a token to those that were killed.
Not near enough of a token to those that were killed.

Also, to keep in the spirit with the subject of the website, but honestly, they had the answer to the future’s woe’s back in 1989.  It was in a slacker time travel comedy that starred a young Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter, called Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure:

Just realized this movie is kind of a Doctor Who ripoff...i
Just realized this movie is kind of a Doctor Who ripoff…i

Beauty and the Beast Trailer: Be Out Guest

Happy Monday you beautiful Bleary-Eyed readers!

We don’t have much in the realm of content this morning (while I will do the updated box office since we have some really cool numbers to go over), but based on the recent success of Disney/John Favreau’s The Jungle Book, I wanted to show off Disney’s latest live action update.

Since Maleficent (which was more of a “behind-the-scenes” version of Sleeping Beauty), Disney has been on a constant string of success with their live-action material from their animated films.  Like last year’s Cinderella:

Cinderella
Simply marvelous and beautiful if I do say so myself

To this years’ epic The Jungle Book, it’s now hard to ignore the charm and actually faithfull filmmaking going into these new live-action adaptations.

In 2017, Disney hopes that we will enjoy another update of a classic tale and bring the same care along with it.  As short as it is, I give you the very cinematic looking Beauty and the Beast teaser trailer:

I’m not sure if you saw the same teaser I did, but from the very beginning, with the cold and snow sweapt castle and the lone light at the top of the tower in the Disney logo, I was hooked.

This is my best effort at a screenshot along with cropping, so if it's terrible, I blame lazy cats.
This is my best effort at a screenshot along with cropping, so if it’s terrible, I blame lazy cats.  But isn’t the logo pretty?

I only have a few comments regarding the teaser.  First off, I’m not sure Ewan McGregor (portraying the sex-feind candalabra Lumiere) knows what a French accent actually is.  Hopefully his Jedi training will kick in and he’ll change a bit.  On the opposite spectrum, you have Ian McKellen’s Cogworth using every aspect of Magneto and Gandalf to not giving a flipping crap about what a French accent might be.  Even the titular star, Emma Watson as Belle doesn’t even try.  I will not say she’s stuck as Hermoine from the Harry Potter films, but I’d like the actors to do something like, oh I don’t know, THEIR JOB!

English Accent
He’s throwing shade at Kevin Costner.  This is a very deep inside joke, good luck at getting it.

Secondly, I have to give Disney such props by allowing Alan Menken to do the music for this film.  The reason I say that is that, is Menken also did the score to the 1991 Animated Beauty and the Beast.  It’s almost as if Disney is daring you to call them on it.

Their new bodyguards are pretty serious.
Their new bodyguards are pretty serious.

Finally, I have to get excited with them choosing Bill Condon to direct the film.  While he does have a few Twilight movies on his resume, we can’t hold mistakes against people who lose bets all the time.  The films he did that are spectacular far outweight anything else.

So, I’m excited that one of my favorite Disney films is getting updated with excellent actors, a competent director, and a fantastic (yet repetitve) scoremaster.  Now, if only they would only do my favorite Disney film:

hercules-1997-movie-poster
I will “Go the Distance” for this film. Yeah, I know that’s a bad joke, but hell I want this film.

-Darkmovienight

The 85th Academy Awards® will air live on Oscar® Sunday, February 24, 2013.

Post Oscar Stuff or Crap that was Okay Last Night

Good morning Bleary-Eyed Fans, did you watch the Academy Awards last night?  No?  Neither did we.  In fact we cared so little, our post was both late, terrible, and unfinished.  Also, as far as predictions, we only got one: Leonardo DiCaprio won his Best Actor in a Leading Role.

Okay, he earned this party
Okay, he earned this party

All I can say is that it seems like a little bit of a pity Oscar.  Not that Leo doesn’t deserve an Academy Award…it’s just that he should have got it one of the other four times he was nominated.  The Revenant just wasn’t that special (and pretty inaccurate).  Oh well, he won, are we done now?

Of course there was a ton of racist issues this Oscars (pretty much like the 87th preceding ones), from boycotting, asking Chris Rock to step down as host, and even the absolutely correct viral statement: #oscarssowhite.  There wasn’t anything we could do and it’s just going to keep happening.  I wish I could say something different, but I can’t. It’s just a despicable time we live in where all people are not created equally.  It’s a shame, but all a movie dissector like myself can do is point it out and choose not to be like those that perpetrate hate and racism.  Although I will say, even though he has quietly slipped into the “B-List” of acting, Chris Rock had some good things to say about it.  I was proud of him monologue (or what I caught snippets of this morning) and while it wasn’t a joke, he didn’t hide anything.

Dude rocked the WHITE suit and told it like it is
Dude rocked the WHITE suit and told it like it is

There are no videos of the full monologue yet, but I’d like to recount my absolute favorite part from Chris Rock’s discussion on race, how awful the Academy Awards are, and how strange the whole damn this is in general:

“But things are changing.  Things are changing.  We got a black Rocky this year.  Some people call it “Creed.”  I call it “Black Rocky.” And that’s a big, that’s an unbelievable statement.  I mean, cause, “Rocky” takes place in a world where white athletes are as good as black athletes.  “Rocky” is a science fiction movie.  There’s things that happened in “Star Wars” that are more believable than things that happened in “Rocky”, O.K.?”
*Sweating bullets* Finn can't tell if that was more racist or less...
*Sweating bullets*
Finn can’t tell if that was more racist or less…

Alright, we can agree I can’t fix racism.  But what I can do is report on some of the better things of the night.  Starting with the big winners:

  • Best Picture: Spotlight
  • Best Actor in a Leading Role: Leonardo di Caprio for The Revenant
  • Best Actress in a Leading Role: Brie Larson for Room
  • Best Actor in a Supporting Role: Mark Rylance for Bridge of Spies
  • Best Actress in a Supporting Role: Alicia Vikander for The Danish Girl
  • Best Director: Alejandro González Iñárritu for The Revenant 
  • Best Animated Feature Film: Inside Out by Disney/Pixar
  • Best Visual Effects: Ex Machina by Andrew Whitehurst, Paul Norris, Mark Ardington, and Sara Bennett
  • Best Original Song: Writing’s on the Wall by Sam Smith for Spectre
  • Most Awards Won: Mad Max: Fury Road with Six Awards

Let me toss in a bit of thoughts regarding the winners after the jump.

Box Office

Monday Morning Shower Report: Star Wars Broke All the Records

Good morning Bleary-Eyed fans, are you awake enough after your third or fourth viewing of Star Wars: The Force Awakens?  Well, prepare to drop the soap as we spend some time on how amazing Star Wars did this weekend.

I'm not getting it, I made that mistake once before and someone stole my wallet
I’m not getting it, I made that mistake once before and someone stole my wallet!

1) Star Wars: The Force Awakens- $238M

There isn’t going to be much else to talk about this morning, so we’re going to get really involved with this film.  And from now on, I’m just going to type “Star Wars” as the movie title so I don’t contract irreversible mega-carpel-tunnel syndrome.  Like I said last week, we all knew that Star Wars was going to break records, but had no idea that it would break all the records.  Let me quickly tick off the records it shattered:

  • Largest opening weekend: $238M, previously held by Jurassic World earlier this year ($208.8M).
  • Largest Thursday showings: $57M, previously held by the final Harry Potter installment ($43.5M) four years ago.
  • Largest opening day (FYI, this does include the above Thursday showings): $120.5M, beating the crap out of the Kid Wizard again which previously held it at $91.1M
  • Largest dollar amount per theater of a wide release: $57.6k per theater, with Star Wars releasing in 4,134 theaters.  There really is no comparison to any other movie here, that’s how far it eclipses everything else.
  • Largest IMAX release: $30.1M out of 391 IMAX screens, making extinct the dinosaurs from earlier this year which had $20.9M.  I’ll do the math for you, that’s $77k per screen…
  • International opening of $279M.  They still have India, Greece, and China (opening in January) to go.

The entire global weekend gross for Star Wars was $517M.  If each person who saw Star Wars only once (not the case, but for sake of jaw-dropping figure), then each human of the Earth’s population (7.3 Billion), will have spent an average of $14.12 a ticket.  That’s right, even toddlers spent $14.12 on average to see Star Wars.

"When does this thing
“When does this thing start, we’ve been in line since 2014!”

Honestly, I knew it was going to be big, but I had no idea the power of the Force, I mean hype.  Now it is estimated that the production costs of Star Wars was north of $200M (not including advertising).  If that is a true number, then Disney/Lucasfilm might eek out a tiny profit…

Kathleen Kennedy (CEO of Lucasfilm) seen in her own shower this morning.
Bob Iger (CEO of Disney) seen here .  Not depicted are Kathleen Kennedy (CEO of Lucasfilm) and J.J. Abrams.  They don’t take golden showers…

All this success does cause a little bit of a problem for I Watch Too Many Movies: we’d love to do a review of Star Wars, but we’ve got a few roadblocks in our way.  We don’t want to spoil it for the 1% who didn’t go this week, and those of you who did see it (likely ANYONE who reads this site) you’ve already made up your mind about how you feel about the film and did your own micro-review on Facebook or Twitter.  I think Manchicken and I will give our thoughts on the film separately in the next few days, but I’m pretty sure those opinions won’t differ too much.

"Let's watch it again." -Manchicken and I
“Let’s watch it again.” -Manchicken and I

2) Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip- $14.4M

Apparently some film studios decided to find a convenient excuse for their movies failing by sacrificing, er, releasing them against Star Wars. 20th Century Fox pulled this move by releasing the fourth movie in the Alvin and the Chipmunks movie franchise.  I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that being a Babysitter this weekend was quite lucrative. And likely this is the film the babysitters’ took the kids to while their parents went and saw Star Wars in the theater next door.

Seen here taking a group selfie after leaving the kids in the Chipmunks theater
Horrible dressed babysitters seen here taking a group selfie after leaving the kids alone in the Chipmunks’ theater.  Who knows, they may have even used a Lightsaber selfie-stick to take this picture

3) Sisters- $13.4M

Universal pulled this trick with Tina Fey and Amy Poehler’s new comedy, Sisters.  Apparently this wasn’t a horrible film, so I don’t know if they just dumped it here or had the misfortune of having this weekend booked for quite a while.  At any rate, it’s a comedy, so it likely didn’t cost much to make and the fact that it made any movie this weekend was an achievement.  The audience consisted mostly of women over 25, so that fits squarely in the demographic that grew up watching these two on Saturday Night Live and haven’t seen or don’t care about seeing Star Wars.

Yeah, you would probably be happier watching Star Wars too
Yeah, you two would probably be happier watching Star Wars as well

4) The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 2- $5.6M ($254.4M Total)

Katniss’ bow, speeches, or constantly waking up in a hospital bed were no match for a good blaster at Star Wars’ side.  After being in the top spot for four straight weeks, the final chapter in The Hunger Games film series finally toppled.  It’s okay, Lionsgate made their money and now they’ll just have to wait for the Blu-Ray/Digital release.  This shouldn’t surprise anyone since it was more or less the same crowd seeing Star Wars.

Startles
Except Startles.  He is continually amazed at the obvious.  We keep him around because it makes us laugh when he watches the movie Memento

5) Creed- $5.1M ($87.9M Total)

Since this is likely the last week in the Top 5 for Creed, there isn’t much to say except we’re looking forward to any type of continuation to this franchise.  Good job Sly, you did a good job here.

That my friends was an intense box office recap session.  I think I need to take a nap.  Sadly, I’ve got movies to watch (I feel like seeing Apollo 13 today), and real jobs to apply for (unless someone wants to pay me for this gig…yeah…didn’t think so).

One thing I worry about is that we continue to teach Hollywood and their evil Tribunal the wrong lessons.  Everyone went to see Star Wars because it was Star Wars and we had faith it was handled properly by J.J.  What they learned: “Franchise all the things!  Revive every film from the 1970’s!  Reboot everything!”  They’ve heard this lesson for so long it’s more of a mantra they chant than something new.

"Oh almighty Box Office master, show us the way!"
“Sequels, franchises and reboots arise!  Sequels, franchises and reboots arise!  Sequels, franchises and reboots ARISE!”

Have a great week my friends and wake up, I know you saw Star Wars four times, but falling asleep in the shower is dangerous to yourself and others.

-Darkmovienight

Box Office

Monday Morning Shower Report: Box Office 12/11-12/13 or the Weekend Before Star Wars Breaks Records

Good morning Bleary-Eyed fans!  We’ve got a quick recap of last weekend’s box office results, but first we have to continue to show you that 20th Century Fox is on a roll with the trailers.  Last week we brought you the X-Men: Apocalypse trailer, and yesterday they dropped another bomb on us: Independence Day: Resurgence trailer.  Check it out:

Now I don’t know about you, but they teased out just a little bit and it really felt good to see a few familiar faces popping up.  And the poster work was done really well and extremely simple:

Nothing flashy, which is odd for Roland Emmerich
Nothing flashy, which is odd for Roland Emmerich
That's more like it!
That’s more like it!

At any rate, I really enjoyed the trailer.  It had a great feel and of course the lesser Hemsworth brother is always welcome in my action movies. Just glad he’s not fighting with a crossbow this time.  Missing however is Will Smith.  I know we all knew he wasn’t doing this film early on, but come up Fresh Prince, you did a third Men in Black movie, would this paycheck had been so hard to cash?  Eh, I saw one or two black dudes in the trailer, so maybe one of them will be Smith’s character’s step-son. Let the speculation begin!  Oh, also of particular excitement was the famous Bill Pullman’s “Independence Day” speech from the first film playing over the end of the trailer, well done trailer editors.

dawson_crying
I don’t care who you are, if you don’t tear up during that speech you’re either one of the aliens who got their ass handed to them or really unpatriotic

Anyway, now that we’re all tearing up, erh, got soap in our eyes, let’s rinse off and get on with the Box Office Countdown from last week!

1)  The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 2- $11.3M ($244.5M Total)

Again, surprising only those with anterograde amnesia, the last Hunger Games film dominated the top spot for the last time.  Four weeks in a row at number one wasn’t a bad run, but I don’t believe Hemsworths, Sutherlands, or Jennifer Lawrence will stop anything from a “Galaxy far far away”.

Although, that smile will be with me...always
Although, that smile will be with me…always

2) In the Heart of the Sea- $11.0M

The better Hemsworth brother did his best to best the Girl on Fire, but sadly this Ron Howard film didn’t really have the same punch of Apollo 13 or one of the Da Vinci Code movies (which is saying something).  I also had a few people tell me they were not going to see the film based on the nature of whaling in general.  I totally agree that we shouldn’t make a species extinct, but isn’t this film about one taking revenge?  Oh well, I didn’t make an effort to see it, instead I watch Tom Hardy play gangster brothers.  I imagine Legend was much better.  Still disappointed, this film had not only The Scarecrow but the new Spider-Man in it and it came out just “meh”. All I’ll say is that Netflix needs to put Ron Howard back to work as the Arrested Development narrator.

Again, I just can't get over these beautiful people and their smile's.
Again, I just can’t get over these beautiful people and their smiles. Sorry Ben, Thor is just really doing it for me right now.

3) The Good Dinosaur- $10.5M ($89.7M Total)

Pixar’s latest film continued to plod along after a lackluster opening and will only be a slight cushion to the enormous butt that Star Wars will have.  Maybe that was Disney’s plan: release a sub-par Pixar film for the kids that might get scared during Star Wars.

Haven't even seen the film and this guy creeps me out
Haven’t even seen the film and this guy creeps me out

Perhaps Disney will allow Pixar to go back to releasing a movie just once a year.  I know the brilliant Inside Out was the only Pixar movie I needed this year.  I think the 2016 slate looks better.  Going back to ocean isn’t going to hurt anyone.

Man, the smiles in these films just really make my day
Man, the smiles in these films just really make my day

4) Creed- $10.1M ($79.3M Total)

Continuing to impress, the spiritual successor to the Rocky franchise is holding its own in the ring (see what I did there?)  A couple sources put the production value at only $35M, so New Line, MGM, and Warner Bros’ are going to make a pretty tidy profit on this one.  Pretty likely to see a sequel to this film.  If they get the whole group back together, who I gushed over, then I’m all for it.  I also don’t see any other boxing movies or the lesser sport, UFC, coming down the pipeline, so any Creed sequel won’t have any stiff competition and I welcome the continued story.

Just something about these guys look ready to take on all competition
Just something about these guys make them look ready to take on all competitors

5) Krampus- $8.0M ($28.2M Total)

I have been debating on seeing this film since it came out.  My original intent was to go see it immediately, but I ended up seeing Mockingjay Part 2 again (see #1 box office position above).  From what I’ve heard, it’s not much more than a Christmas-y type horror/comedy.  I’ve heard some pretty bold comparisons, so I may just have to break down and see this film for myself sometime this week.  Maybe on Thursday, the crowds won’t be that bad, right?

No smiles here...
No smiles here…sorry

Thus we have another morning shower while discussing last week’s box office.  Of course make sure to thank Bill Pullman for putting soap in our eyes.  Oh, and how could we forget the amazing Jeff Goldblum for saving us once again.  Perhaps this time he’ll use an iPad.  Funny how Steve Jobs inadvertently saved the Earth.

Watch out
Watch out aliens, I’m armed with an iPhone 6S Plus with iOS 9.2…and my sexy abs. 

-Darkmovienight

Box Office

Monday Morning Shower Report: Thanksgiving Edition

Good Morning Bleary-Eyed fans, hopefully you’ve recovered from your food comas’ and the inevitable Black Friday wounds.  Don’t forget Cyber Monday deals can also be just as dangerous and painful, just think of the Carpul Tunnel Syndrome.   The surgery you have to have looks like it is straight out of some horror B-Movie special effects.

Want to know how I got these scars?
Want to know how I got these scars?  Amazon, ’15, so many deals, just couldn’t stop…

While we are all gingerly tending to our wounds and over-sized stomachs, your fellow Bleary-Eyed fans will take care of those “hard to reach” places…like belly buttons and behind the ears.  Onto the Top 5 movies everyone watched during their glutton fest!  (Note: this is only counting the Friday to Sunday numbers as Wednesday releases are calculated from opening to Thursday).

1) The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 2- $51.6M ($198.3M Total)

Have to admit I am a little surprised here since a Pixar film released this week, but I’ll go ahead and give the franchise its due, it can certainly make money.  Maybe it doesn’t completely tell a coherent story, but it’s entertaining enough to get our seals of approval.  People will keep seeing this and I think it’ll have a long run in the Top 5.  Kinda like that aunt who came to stay for Thanksgiving, but decided she might as well stay till Christmas.  After all, Southwest doesn’t charge for changing flights!

Hell, she might solve a murder or two while she's there
Hell, she might solve a murder or two while she’s there, you do own a typewriter, right?

2) The Good Dinosaur ($55.6M Total)

The Good Dinosaur was the second worst opening of a Pixar film and the worst you might ask?  Toy Story– the first film by an untested studio even though it was attached to Disney (note, if you look it up Toy Story 2 and A Bug’s Life’s opening weekend gross, you’ll notice severely low numbers due to them only releasing in one theater their opening weekend, the following weekend would be the true opening and follows what is seen regarding about The Good Dinosaur’s opening.)  This is a bit odd as there really isn’t another cartoon other than The Peanuts Movie out and that doesn’t appeal to “today’s children”.  Thankfully it was still an entertaining film and those that went likely enjoyed it.  I have a feeling it might see a reasonable run at the box office, especially as schools start to let out.

Perhaps it's because they forgot to add Chris Pratt and motorcycles
Perhaps it’s because they forgot to add Chris Pratt and motorcycles.  Key miss Pixar.

3) Creed ($42.6M Total)

I’ll do my best to get a review out there soon, but believe me when I say, this film is good.  If you’ve ever enjoyed a sports film (Remember the Titans, Hoosiers, or The Mighty Ducks) then you will fall completely head over heels for this film that passes the torch from the Rocky franchise to a new and younger generation.

Seriously, do yourself a favor and enjoy this as soon as you can.
Seriously, do yourself a favor and enjoy this film as soon as you can.

4) Spectre- $12.8M ($176.1M Total)

007 and Blofeld continue to rake in a few million over the past few weekends.  Spectre still lags behind Skyfall especially with inflation, but it does continue to weigh our action lust until The Force Awakens releases.  Then Bond can retire for another three to five years.

Hell, I wouldn't mind retiring with an Aston Martin
Hell, I wouldn’t mind retiring with an Aston Martin.  It would have to have all the weapons still in tact, I have MAJOR road rage and want to be able to take care of some annoying traffic

5) The Peanuts Movie- $9.7M ($116.8M Total)

On the plus side, The Peanuts Movie has made back it’s $99M budget so far, but they still have to make back the marketing and such they did in the US.  Also, it does have a place in the Top 10 of “G-Rated Film Grosses”.  Depending upon when it finishes its theatrical run, that ranking will likely go up.  One thing I’m sure Fox is watching closely is to see if they can engage new viewership and create new specials.  I don’t know if that’ll work, but if it gives them a lift on the Halloween and Christmas Special sales, then it’ll have been worth it.

That's right little baby, it is all about the Benjamins
That’s right little baby, it is all about the Benjamins.  So no pooping on them.

That’s it for our Top 5.  My hope is that a lot more people will Creed a chance in the next few weeks.  I doubt Miss Katniss Everdeen will give up her hold on the top spot for another week or two, but in less than 18 days, the most anticipated movie this year will blow our minds out the back of our skulls.

I could have shown real brain matter blown all over the place, but I figured since we all just got cleaned up in the shower, I’ll spare you look at that type of horror and just show the first amazing Captain America: Civil War trailer instead.  It’ll likely play before Star Wars.

Hope to have a detailed Creed review to you all tomorrow and we’ve got some great surprises for Wednesday Wars, just pay attention, or actually read this site.

-Darkmovienight

Box Office

Monday Morning Shower Report: Box Office 11/20-11/22

Good morning to all of our Bleary-Eyed fans that actually have to go to work today.  Sadly, being unemployed, I have a lot of time to shower, so I find myself with the hot water turning frigid while I rock and cry myself to numbness.  It’s especially embarrassing since I had Jennifer Lawrence in the there this morning.

It's pretty much like this but I don't believe vaccines give kids autism
It’s pretty much like this except I don’t believe vaccines give kids autism

Those of you brave enough to comfort me, hop on in and lend me your body heat while we go over the pre-Thanksgiving Box Office Top 5 from last weekend:

1)  The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 2- $101M

Surprising no one except your pet goldfish named “Startles”, the final film in the dystopian young adult series took the number one spot. Interestingly enough, this was about $20M less than Part 1 did last year around the same time frame.  I’m just hoping we’re done with the “two-part final act” to make more money tactic.  Look forward to this having a shorter run than its predecessors due to Thanksgiving releasing a new Pixar film (first time we’ve ever had two in a year) and then The Force Awakens releasing in less than a month (I know, me too).  I don’t envy Lionsgate having to explain to their shareholders next year why they’re down by about a $100M compared to this year.

I can recommend a good place to jump from...
Hey Lionsgate guys, I can recommend an entertaining place to jump from…

2) Spectre- $14.6M ($153.7M Total)

Finally getting knocked off the top spot was 007’s latest adventure, Spectre.  It had a good two week run at the #1 spot, but after being out for three weeks, it had no chance against an event film like Mockingjay Part 2.  The Master Spy is still raking in a respectable $153.7M total domestic box office gross, with another $524M  coming from the Foreign markets.  This was largely helped by it releasing in England, Japan, and South Korea over the past few weeks. Make no mistake, the Foreign market is becoming a lot more important to Hollywood right now as American’s continue swimming in debt and iPhones.  Wouldn’t be surprised if the next Bond film catered a little more to those markets.

Having Psy doing the opening theme song was a...unique choice
Having Psy do the opening theme song was an interesting and unique choice…

3) The Peanuts Movie- $12.8M ($98.9M Total)

Charlie Brown and the gang are in for some trouble as when Disney/Pixar’s The Good Dinosaur drops this week, so their box office $$’s will turn to figurative peanuts (I couldn’t help myself, I think I have a problem).  For a film based on an over 50 year old property, $98.9M isn’t too bad (considering the budget was $99M) in three weeks.  The 3D definitely helps, but as that wanes from the public’s collective attention, other films like The Peanuts Movie won’t be so lucky.

The gritty Flintstones remake was questionable as it was
The gritty Flintstones remake was questionable as it was

4) The Night Before- $10.1M

Releasing in almost half the theaters that The Hunger Games debuted in, the new comedy with Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Seth Rogen, and Anthony Mackie did about as well as you’d expect considering the competition. This being the opening weekend and a ton of new movies piling on top of it, The Night Before isn’t going to become a Christmas Classic in theaters, but it’ll find it’s following when it’s released on Blu-Ray/OnDemand early next year.

You think they billed this as a CHRISTMAS MOVIE?
You think Fox was crazy and billed this as a HOLIDAY MOVIE before we made it the BEST Christmas film ever?  Yippiee ki-yay Father Christmas!

5) Secret in Their Eyes- $6.6M

A pretty forgettable Julia Roberts crime drama takes the final spot on our countdown.  She really hasn’t stared in anything since 2010’s Eat, Pray, Love, which is a shame since she’s talented, but maybe she’s just not auditioning for anything. I honestly didn’t even give this any consideration or remember it released this week.  Film companies often dump a movie they don’t believe in during a week an Event Film comes out or in January when everyone’s currency has been converted to gift cards.

Now I can buy all the things and let the company use the final $1.39 as interest for the next 30 years!
I can now buy all the things and let the companies keep the $1.39 left on the card

That’s it for the Top 5 and I believe my tears have frozen to my face and I should probably stop rocking in the fetal position in front of Jennifer Lawrence.  We’ve got kind of a lull with films over the next few weeks after Thanksgiving.  You’ll have your choice to watch a possible cult Christmas horror film with Krampus or the account that “inspired” the legend of Moby Dick.  I personally have to check out both of them, but my red and puffy post-crying eyes will likely enjoy the Thor lead whale movie better.

 "Call me Ishmael"
“Call me Ishmael”

We here at I Watch Too Many Movies wish you a wonderful Thanksgiving and get to avoid your extend families by spending them in the comfort of a dark theater.  Also, Manchicken is dubbed Manturkey for the duration of the week in honor of the Holiday.  And don’t forget, no discount is worth your life: stay home on Thanksgiving and Black Friday. There is this new thing called the “Internet” that doesn’t usually trample anyone to death.

See Al Gore’s new documentary, “An Unlikely Truth and a Terrible Joke”

-Darkmovienight

Box Office

Monday Morning Shower Report: Box Office 11/6-11/8

Good morning you fine Bleary-Eyed fans.  It’s Monday morning and it’s time to look back at the weekend and determine which films slugged it out for the top spot in the Box Office Battle Royale.  As you might recall, my money was on Spectre for a $60-$80M debut.  Check out the number One on our list.  Now that we’re all in the shower together…can you now see my powers of insight?  Do they make you tremble?  Will you fear my mind?

Or just
Or can you just clean my perfectly sculpted butt?

Cleanliness aside, let’s find out the Top 5 from last weekend:

1) Spectre- $73.0M

Ah ha!  I told you all where the gross would be, did you listen?  No.  Did you attempt to make guesses of your own?  No.  What does this tell me? No one is reading this stuff… Oh well, my hurt feelings aside, congrats to 007 for another great performance at the Box Office.  While Skyfall still holds the record for the largest opening of any Bond film with $87.8M in 2012, Spectre did well enough to overthrow The Martian from it’s six week reign at the Number One spot or near it.

Take that Damon! Oh, cute bag too
Take that Damon!  Your pink bag is no match for Daniel Craig’s dreamy eyes

We’ll have our official review for Spectre later today, so we can talk more about Craig’s fourth outing as the Spy Supreme and if we believe he should continue.

2) The Peanuts Movie – $45.0M

As predicted, Charles Schultz’s legacy on display in modern animation took the second spot this week.  Sadly, the nostalgia wasn’t strong enough to get The Peanuts Movie even remotely close to the largest animated opening of 2015 (Minions @ $115.7M in July).  It’s a shame that more people were not interested in the Schultz toon, but from what others have said, it stayed close to the source material and respected the fans and legacy.  It may not make much money, but the film adds another notch on the belt for a successful and beloved franchise.

NEW YORK, NY - OCTOBER 30: Meredith Vieira, Willie Geist, Carson Daly, Natalie Morales, Tamron Hall, Al Roker, Savannah Guthrie, Matt Lauer, Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford attend NBC's "Today": Spooktacular Costume Party at Rockefeller Plaza on October 30, 2015 in New York City. (Photo by John Lamparski/WireImage)
Sadly we got this nightmare fuel from “The Today Show” that might have put off a few potential viewers…

3) The Martian- $9.3M ($197.1M Total)

Continuing in the Top 5 for its sixth week, The Martian continues to thrill audiences and take their money like a mugger in New York.  The total above represents the Domestic Box Office, but to truly give you a “wow” statistic, the Worldwide gross to date is an excellent $458.5M.  Now, that doesn’t hold much of a candle to Jurassic World’s Worldwide total of $1.7B, but for it not being a sequel, a remake, or Superhero film, The Martian is doing just fine.

Unless you're this
Unless you’re this Martian, he’s still waiting for Space Jam 2…

Matt Damon and the Red Planet continue to delight and we at I Watch Too Many Movies couldn’t be happier as it will hopefully reignite the love for space and exploration.  Maybe we’ll get to Mars a little faster due to this film’s popularity.

4) Goosebumps- $7.0M ($66.4M Total)

The nostalgia machine Goosebumps continues to plod along, but with it being November, it doesn’t look like it’ll be going too much farther.  In general we enjoyed what we saw, and despite our earlier concerns, they actually came up with a creative way to bring the books of our childhood to life.  Check it out when it comes out video or streaming, but don’t expect anything other than a comedy that the family can enjoy. You never know, it might be a great excuse to get your kids reading the beloved books from your past.

Only disappointment was leaving my favorite book out of the film
Only disappointment was leaving my favorite book out of the film

5) Bridge of Spies- $6.1M ($55.0M Total)

Rounding out the Top 5 this weekend was Steven Spielberg’s Bridge of Spies.  The film wasn’t built to be a blockbuster success, but give a little bit of history and allow Tom Hanks to stretch acting legs before he’s forced to pick up the role of Robert Langdon in Ron Howard’s Inferno.

Yeah, we're a little surprised you keep coming back too
Yeah, we’re a little surprised you keep coming back too this series as well, does Dan Brown have something on you Tom?

What Bridge of Spies does do is give us a stark contrast from the action/adventure/heroics of Spectre.  Ask most people though, and they’ll take 007 over anything close to reality.

That rolls up our Top 5 from last weekend’s Box Office.  I don’t foresee too much shakeup in the Box Office until November 20th when we get the conclusion of The Hunger Games, some crazy hijinks with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Seth Rogen,  and a biographical film featuring Tom Hardy portraying identical twin gangsters.  I’ve got 5 to 1 odds that we’ll be seeing some big numbers in the next few weeks.

When The Hunger Games ends, you have my permission to make money
When The Hunger Games is over, you have my permission to see my film

Enjoy the week and remember not to get too much soap in your eyes, because this crowded shower isn’t good about sharing the water.

-Darkmovienight

Box Office

Monday Morning Shower Report: Box Office 10/30-11/1

Good Monday our Bleary-Eyed Fans.  I know it’s been a little while since we have updated the Top 5 Box Office Results, but frankly, you don’t pay attention anyway, so why should we spend time on you?  I recall we asked for adoration and love last time, but we only received a few dollars through Paypal.  They were soggy and crusty too.  How do you make internet currency soggy?

Photo illustration of dirty money in the Tribune Studio on Wednesday, 11 Jan 2012 for the features section. (Bill Hogan/ Chicago Tribune) B581814461Z.1 ....OUTSIDE TRIBUNE CO.- NO MAGS, NO SALES, NO INTERNET, NO TV, NEW YORK TIMES OUT, CHICAGO OUT, NO DIGITAL MANIPULATION...
Perhaps it is best we not accept money from p0rna11thetimez@juicylover.com.

Soiled Paypal funds aside, let us all hop in the shower for last weekend’s Top 5 Box Office Films:

1) The Martian- $11.4M ($182.8M Total)

This is a glorious time to be alive.  Not only does this film perfectly do justice to the novel, but it is feeding a space love for the populace I have not seen since Ron Howard’s Apollo 13.  You can read our review here.  Also, just a note, if you have an AMC Theater near you, they are doing a special IMAX 3D screening this week only, so that’ll give it another boost and you should go see it a second time with this superior format.  In conjunction with all of the Mars and Pluto news, I hope and believe we can get these kids that are in High School or College more interested in space again.    There is a lot of it and it keeps getting better.  Or they could always explore the ocean.

Or we could leave the Oceans to Aquaman and he'll handle the "Dragonfish" (as pants soiling seen above)
Or we could leave the Oceans to Aquaman and he’ll handle the “Dragonfish” (seen above plotting your demise)

2) Goosebumps- $10.2M ($57.1M Total)

Just saw this film last night and I have to say it deserves the money that is coming its way.  Not only did it give a good injection of nostalgia, but it was a good “Coming of Age/Fish Out of Water” film.  I really enjoyed the special effects and Jack Black seemed fairly grounded in his role as the titular R.L. Stine.  I would definitely recommend this for families, but since it is post Halloween, I see a steep drop in this film’s theatrical run, so go soon or wait for the release on some sort of Home/Mobile device.

3) Bridge of Spies- $8.1M ($45.2M Total)

It’s been three years since we saw the last Steven Spielberg film (Lincoln, 2012) and almost ten years since he and Tom Hanks joined together to form MegaHanksBerg (The Terminal, 2004).  MegaHanksBerg is obviously a giant mech that fights monsters.  Just wanted to make that clear to everyone.  We saw this one, but didn’t believe it warranted a review, mainly due to just a common theme, Tom Hanks makes us watch him pee, and a simple drama from MegaHanksBerg.  Just a film you will be happy to catch on the FX channel or rent from Redbox.

4) Hotel Transylvania 2- $5.8M ($156.0M Total)

The Peanuts Movie comes to town this weekend and most likely puts a stake in the heart of this film in the Top 5.  Again, another one we didn’t review, but the quick notes on it is that it is more or less the same as the first film but with less substance and just a slightly different message. The animation was gorgeous (which I’ve come to expect from Sony Pictures Animation) colorful, and lush, but they need to put more effort in their next slate of films.  Sadly, the next thing they have coming is a way outdated license, The Angry Birds Movie.   It’s a shame, why can’t we just have a third Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs?

5) Burnt- $5.0M

The only new addition to the Top 5 and releasing in 3k theaters, you would expect a better outcome.  Perhaps the studios were banking too heavily on Bradley Cooper’s star power.  I could have told them if he’s not paired with Jennifer Lawrence, Ed Helms, Zach Galifianakis, or voicing the most violent and badass raccoon in the Galaxy, he just doesn’t carry a film.  Well, Limitless was pretty good, but they sneaked Robert di Niro in there, so maybe that might be the reason for its success.  I plan on consuming this film this week and serving up a review out before the main dishes of Spectre and The Peanuts Movie are out of the oven.  Everyone see what I did there?  Food jokes in a paragraph about a food movie…  I know, I’ll see myself out.

Hopefully everyone is looking for a big debut for Daniel Craig’s 007 in Spectre. I’m anticipating an opening release gross of somewhere in the neighborhood of $60-$80M.  We still have not given out anything for a contest and this would be a good time.  All Bleary-Eyed fans: make a prediction of the Domestic Opening gross for Spectre, and the person who is closest (Price is Right rules), will win a copy of The Martian when it comes out on DVD/Blu-Ray.  Please leave your guesses below or on our Facebook page for this post.  Good luck everyone and make sure to clean really well behind your ears, they’re more filthy than usual.

Photo illustration of dirty money in the Tribune Studio on Wednesday, 11 Jan 2012 for the features section. (Bill Hogan/ Chicago Tribune) B581814461Z.1 ....OUTSIDE TRIBUNE CO.- NO MAGS, NO SALES, NO INTERNET, NO TV, NEW YORK TIMES OUT, CHICAGO OUT, NO DIGITAL MANIPULATION...
Still not as bad as some things…